Oh No! People Are Falling Out Of My Network! (Communication: Part 5)


Charles McCrumb Small Business IT Project Analyst, Office Automation Expert Herbert, McCrumb & Associates
Charles McCrumb
Small Business IT Project Analyst, Office Automation Expert
Herbert, McCrumb & Associates

They guys at Manager-Tools.com and Career-Tools.com, in their podcast “Building a Network”, state that people will fall out of your network and that’s okay. I suggest that it’s somewhat stronger than that:

It’s REALLY IMPORTANT that people fall out of your network, and here’s why: Those that are falling out will NEVER call you for help, you can’t count on them to help you, and they can’t be relied on for anything other than a brief comment on their social media feed (again I mention an acquaintance with 2,485 “friends” on Facebook, I say “acquaintance” because it’s only a collection, and I’m only a tiny part of that collection, and not someone that he [the empirical “he”, could just as easily be “she”] wants to stay in touch with).

For example: Say for instance you have 1,000 people in your network (just to keep the math easy). If by chance you lose your job, how many can be RELIED UPON to help you? You have NO WAY OF KNOWING if the unreliable ones haven’t been filtered out over the past 2 years. There may only be 600 that are partial toward you and willing to help you, and the other 400 may only be tepid at best. If you need to hire some people, who are you going to call? The folks you know and trust always get the call before an agency.

The people in your network that YOU can help will tend to ENGAGE YOU in conversation, or at least acknowledge that you have attempted communication with them or reply to you. If after 2 years of you offering help quarterly, a person falls out of your network, manager-tools, & career-tools argue that they never WERE in your network of people that YOU can help. I agree.

I wish there was a faster way to find this out, but as my dad says “Them’s the breaks!”. Those people may attempt to contact you sometime later, but you certainly don’t OWE them anything. You may decide to put them back into regular communication, but it’s certainly up to you (and I would). If then, they stay in touch, keep them in your system and communicate, offering to help them. But if then, he or she resumes his or her bad habit of ill communication, and after 2 years falls out again. Oh well.

Cheers! 😎

Charles McCrumb
Small Business IT Project Analyst, Office Automation Expert
Herbert, McCrumb & Associates
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Attend ALL Social Events


OKAY, here it is: Go to every social event you can reasonably attend, for several reasons:

1. Networking (meeting people, not networking computer systems together).
You won’t meet people that you can help without getting out there. Trust is built on lots and lots of giving. Who do you want to do business with: the person that has no time for you, or the person that has been helpful, that you trust? Being helpful is what makes us valuable to each other. By attending social events, you make yourself available to help others!

2. Staying in touch with people.
Social networking (Facebook, Twitter, et al), good for staying in touch, but better is actual touch, shaking someone’s hand or giving a big hug, and saying “How are you? Is there anything can I help you with?” Lets face it, human contact is what it’s about. It’s what it all is about. The secret of the universe isn’t that big of a secret, or even that complicated: We are here to love and be loved. 

3. Have some fun.
Get out and have a good time. If you don’t go, you deprive other people of the joy of your presence, and yourself of theirs.

4. Get some new experiences for a broader topic base.
By attending social functions, you have experiences that are unique to you. You now have other things to talk about. Without new experiences, you’ll stagnate, tell the same old stories and jokes to the same old people.

5. Your circle of friends will get smaller if you don’t.
As we go through time (age), we lose friends and family along the way as we (or they) move away, die, or we lose touch. Our circles of friends, family and acquaintances gets smaller. Don’t let that happen. Most people just think “That’s the way it goes, she’s busy, I’m busy.” Yes, we’re all busy but don’t let that be an excuse.

Force yourself to attend every social event that you can reasonably go to. Your friends (old and new) will be glad you did!

Cheers!

Charles McCrumb, Office Automation Expert
Visit us at http://www.hm-associates.com
Like us on Facebook for instant updates on what Herbert, McCrumb & Associates is doing, how we’re doing it, and how we’re saving real people time and money!
http://www.facebook.com/HerbertMcCrumbAssociates
email: charles@hm-associates.com
Skype: charles.mccrumb
Bus: (626) 593-6700